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September 23, 2012
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A poetic response to poem number LIV in Pablo Neruda’s Book of Questions nerudaproject.wordpress.com/ca….

9/23-25/2012.
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:iconmeggie272:
Meggie272 Oct 9, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
I love this. It feels really fragile and delicate - you captured an atmosphere well.
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:iconbeeinthebottle:
Thank you. :heart:
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:iconhalcyonshores:
halcyonshores Oct 3, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
:worship:
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:iconhalcyonshores:
halcyonshores Oct 4, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
:heart:
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:iconbrassteeth:
:nod:
really strong.
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:iconbeeinthebottle:
Thank you. :)
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:iconvespera:
vespera Sep 25, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Oh I like the addition.

One tiny grammar question -

Time blinks,
fades <----why no semicolon here
Swallows peck
at a bismuth moon

Light fails; <----and why one here?
leaves dance



just that they seem to be fairly structurally the same but you're making a different choice in each of them.
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:iconbeeinthebottle:
Easy. :) The first one isn't an independent clause. (A clause that can stand on its own, the equivalent of a simple sentence.) There's no subject-verb in the first one; the comma takes the place of an "and."
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:iconvespera:
vespera Sep 25, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
****the comma

I can't type today :(
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